How often do you hear parents who overindulge their children, referring to this behavior in terms of love? A family therapist might argue that this is just irresponsible parenting. And what may feel like loving behavior for one person, may not appear to be loving for another. Often when we try to put words into action, it doesn't always translate how we intended it to. What are some of the ways that you express the love that you feel? The Word Love is Used in a Thousand Different Ways It can be used to describe anything from our favorite foods, to our favorite activities, to the people who we love most in the world. The trouble is that the notion of love is a linguistic and semantic minefield. And the bottom line is, that if we wish to have reciprocated and loving relationships, then we need to learn our partner's love language. Your own emotional love language and your partner's language, may be as different as Chinese is from English.
Ultimately, for effective communication, we need to learn each other's language. So, communication can occur, but it'll likely appear awkward and unnatural. Communication will be limited, so to understand each other, we may try to point, grunt, draw, or even act out our ideas. The difficulty arises when we speak a specific language and encounter someone who speaks another. However, as with all things, practice makes perfect, and the more you speak a particular language, the easier it becomes. Later on in life, we may learn a new language, which can take an enormous effort. We all grow up speaking a primary language. This approach means looking at language, which forms the basis of connection. So Chapman suggests going back to the basics. When it's in jeopardy, we go to therapy, couples' counseling, or maybe even turn to the internet for advice on, "how to rekindle the spark." The problem is that it's difficult to resolve issues when partners don't understand each other. Keeping love alive is a serious business. When it Comes to Love, We all Speak Different Languages Chapman suggests that learning one another's love language is the key to building long-lasting relationships. This summary briefly looks at The Five Love Languages, and provides simple yet profound insights that can help us grow closer to the people we love. Giving and receiving love is one thing that makes us human, but the way we express and react to love, tends to get lost in translation. He has dedicated his life's work to exploring the simple yet very complex four-letter word. Gary Chapman is a priest, anthropologist, and relationship expert. Understanding these love languages helps to identify needs and creates deeper and longer-lasting connections.Īuthor Dr. We may lean towards Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Receiving Gifts, Quality Time, or Physical Touch. The Five Love Languages introduces different ways that we express and relate to love. But staying in love: that's the hard part.
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